The Art of Conscious Conversations

Description

Ditch the negative mental habits that derail conversations and destroy projects, and discover a framework for forging authentic, enduring, and productive connections.We live in conversations like fish live in water—we’re in them all the time, so we don’t think about them much. As a result, we often find ourselves stuck in cyclical patterns of unproductive behaviors. We listen half-heartedly, react emotionally, and respond habitually, like we’re on autopilot.
This book is a practical guide for thoughtfully reflecting on conversations so we can avoid the common pitfalls that cause our relationships and work to go sideways. Chuck Wisner identifies four universal types of conversations and offers specific advice on maximizing the effectiveness of each:
Storytelling—Investigate the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves and others

Collaborative—Explore the way our stories and other people’s stories interact

Creative—See new possibilities and discover unforeseen solutions

Commitment—Make promises we know we can keep

These conversations unfold sequentially: our awareness of our and others’ stories transforms our ability to listen and collaborate, which opens our thoughts to creative possibilities, guiding us toward mindful agreements.
Our conversations—at home, at work, or in public—can be sources of pleasure and stepping-stones toward success, or they can cause pain and lead to failure. Wisner shows how we can form a connection from the very first conversation and keep our discourse positive and productive throughout any endeavor. ContentsIntroduction: Waking Up in Conversations
Part I: Storytelling Conversations: Your Stories Are Not the Truth1. The Birth of Stories
2. Emotions, Facts, and Stories
3. Opinions and Private Conversations
4. Processing Opinions and Private Conversations
Part II: Collaborative Conversations: Seek to Understand and Absorb Other Perspectives5. In Conversation with Others
6. Private Conversations
7. Open Advocacy and Inquiry
Part III: Creative Conversations: Trust Your Intuition8. From Resignation to Wonder
9. Intuition and Presence
10. Co-creative Conversations
Part IV: Commitment Conversations: Don’t Make Promises You Can’t Keep11. The Conversational Bypass
12. Requests, Offers, and Promises
13. Recovery Conversations
Conclusion: A Lifelong Journey “Chuck’s models of communication and leadership helped me investigate my thinking patterns, unconscious judgments, and ‘stories.’ This journey has made me not only a better leader but a better person.”
—Doug Field, Chief EV and Digital Systems Officer, Ford Motor Company 
“The Art of Conscious Conversations is a thought-provoking and practical guide to unpacking conversations at work and in life.  Seasoned leadership coach Chuck Wisner shares his personal experiences and compelling stories of others who’ve successfully used the techniques he shares in this book to encourage us all to approach conversations with curiosity and introspection.  A compelling read with a big impact.”
                                         -Susan McPherson, author of The Lost Art of Connecting 
“Conversations are a portal into strengthening our relationships, yet they aren’t always treated with the care they deserve. In The Art of Conscious Conversation, Wisner unpacks the key ingredients to having more thoughtful, connected, and collaborative conversations. This is a helpful guide for building better relationships, one conversation at a time.”
             -Ximena Vengoechea, author of Listen Like You Mean it  
 
“What Chuck teaches best is how to use words effectively to reduce misunderstanding and conflict. His easy-to-remember concepts helped me examine my thinking and interactions and transform my conversations at work and at home.” —Vineet Mehta, Director of System Modeling and Battery Technology, Tesla Chuck Wiser is president of Wisner Consulting. His client list includes companies such as Google, Rivian, Apple, Tesla, Harvard Business School, Ford, and Chrysler. Wisner was a senior affiliated mediator with the Harvard Mediation Program and was among the first to be certified through the Mastering the Art of Professional Coaching program at the Newfield Institute. He was also a specialist in organizational learning and leadership as an affiliate with MIT’s Center for Organizational Learning. US