Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing

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Celebrate 50 years of Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing!

The #1 New York Times bestselling author’s first book in her classic Fudge series.

Two is a crowd when Peter and his little brother, Fudge, are in the same room. Grown-ups think Fudge is absolutely adorable, but Peter and his pet turtle, Dribble, know the truth. From throwing temper tantrums to smearing mashed potatoes on the wall, Fudge causes mischief wherever he goes!

“As a kid, Judy Blume was my favorite author, and Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing was my favorite book.”—Jeff Kinney, author of the bestselling Wimpy Kid series

Love Fudge, Peter, and Sheila? Read all these books featuring your favorite characters:
Otherwise Known as Sheila the Great
Superfudge
Fudge-a-Mania
Double Fudge Praise for Judy Blume and the Fudge books:

“Each [Fudge book] is packed with wacky earthy disasters that are her trademark and that children love to read about . . . Judy Blume has a knack for knowing what children think about and an honest, highly amusing way of writing about it.” —The New York Times
 
“It’s a pleasure to watch a talented author like Judy Blume consistently create books that reflect a
remarkable ability for combining humor with perceptive insight into a child’s world.” —Publishers Weekly
 
“Blume has her eye on the fine details of life, whether funny or frustrating.” —Booklist
 
“For anyone who has ever been ‘burdened’ by a pesky younger brother, there’s fast and funny
reading in this story.” —Children’s Digest on Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing
 
“As usual, Blume’s humor and pitch-perfect ear for sibling rivalry and family dynamics will have readers giggling with recognition. Newcomers and Fudge fans alike will savor this installment in the well-loved series.” —Booklist on Double Fudge
 
 “Fudge-a-Mania infects kids with giggles.” —BookPage on Fudge-a-ManiaJudy Blume spent her childhood in Elizabeth, New Jersey, making up stories inside her head. She has spent her adult years in many places doing the same thing, only now she writes her stories down on paper. Adults as well as children will recognize such Blume titles as Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret; Blubber; Just as Long as We’re Together; and the five book series about the irrepressible Fudge. She has also written four novels for adults, In the Unlikely Event, Summer Sisters, Smart Women, and Wifey, all of them New York Times bestsellers. More than 80 million copies of her books have been sold, and her work has been translated into thirty-one languages. She receives thousands of letters a year from readers of all ages who share their feelings and concerns with her. Judy received a BS in education from New York University in 1961, which named her a Distinguished Alumna in 1996, the same year the American Library Association honored her with the Margaret A. Edwards Award for Lifetime Achievement. In 2004 she received the National Book Foundation’s Medal for Distinguished Contribution to American Letters.The Big Winner
I won Dribble at Jimmy Fargo’s birthday party. All the other guys got to take home goldfish in little plastic bags. I won him because I guessed there were three hundred and forty-eight jelly beans in Mrs. Fargo’s jar. Really, there were four hundred and twenty-three, she told us later. Still, my guess was closest. "Peter Warren Hatcher is the big winner!" Mrs. Fargo announced.

At first I felt bad that I didn’t get a goldfish too. Then Jimmy handed me a glass bowl. Inside there was some water and three rocks. A tiny green turtle was sleeping on the biggest rock. All the other guys looked at their goldfish. I knew what they were thinking. They wished they could have tiny green turtles too.

I named my turtle Dribble while I was walking home from Jimmy’s party. I live at 25 West 68th Street. It’s an old apartment building. But it’s got one of the best elevators in New York City. There are mirrors all around. You can see yourself from every angle. There’s a Soft, cushioned bench to sit on if you’re too tired to stand. The elevator operator’s name is Henry Bevelheimer. He lets us call him Henry because Bevelheimer’s very hard to say.

Our apartment’s on the twelfth floor. But I don’t have to tell Henry. He already knows. He knows everybody in the building. He’s that smart! He even knows I’m nine and in fourth grade.

I showed him Dribble right away. I won him at a birthday party," I said.

Henry smiled. "Your mother’s going to be surprised."

Henry was right. My mother was really surprised. Her mouth opened when I said, "Just look at what I won at Jimmy Fargo’s birthday party." I held up my tiny green turtle. "I’ve already named him . . . Dribble! Isn’t that a great name for a turtle?"

My mother made a face. "I don’t like the way he smells," she said.

"What do you mean?" I asked. I put my nose right down close to him. I didn’t smell anything but turtle. So Dribble smells like turtle, I thought. Well, he’s supposed to. That’s what he is!

"And I’m not going to take care of him either," my mother added.

"Of course you’re not," I told her. "He’s my turtle. And I’m the one who’s going to take care of him."

"You’re going to change his water and clean out his bowl and feed him and all of that?" she asked.

"Yes," I said. "And even more. I’m going to see to it that he’s happy!"

This time my mother made a funny noise. Like a groan.

I went into. my bedroom. I put Dribble on top of my dresser. I tried to pet him and tell him he would be happy living with me. But it isn’t easy to pet a turtle. They aren’t soft and furry and they don’t lick you or anything. Still, I had my very own pet at last.

Later, when I sat down at the dinner table, my mother said, "I smell turtle. Peter, go and scrub your hands!"

Some people might think that my mother is my biggest problem. She doesn’t like turtles and she’s always telling me to scrub my hands. That doesn’t mean just run them under the water. Scrub means I’m supposed to use soap and rub my hands together. Then I’ve got to rinse and dry them. I ought to know by now. I’ve heard it enough!

But my mother isn’t my biggest problem. Neither is my father. He spends a lot of time watching commercials on TV. That’s because he’s in the advertising business. These days his favorite commercial is the one about Juicy-O. He wrote it himself. And the president of -the Juicy-O company liked it so much he sent my father a whole crate of Juicy-O for our family to drink. It tastes like a combination of oranges, pineapples, grapefruits, pears, and bananas. (And if you want to know the truth, I’m getting pretty sick of drinking it.) But Juicy-O isn’t my biggest problem either.

My biggest problem is my brother, Farley Drexel Hatcher. He’s two-and-a-half years old. Everybody calls him Fudge. I feel sorry for him if he’s going to grow up with a name like Fudge, but I don’t say a word. It’s none of my business.

Fudge is always in my way. He messes up everything he sees. And when he gets mad he throws himself flat on the floor and he screams. And he kicks. And he bangs his fists. The only time I really like him is when he’s sleeping. He sucks four fingers on his left hand and makes a slurping noise.

When Fudge saw Dribble he said, "Ohhhhh see!"

And I said, "That’s my turtle, get it? Mine! You don’t touch him."

Fudge said, "No touch." Then he laughed like crazy.US

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